Lessons Of The Blog Fathers

Those of us who pay attention to the lessons of the blog fathers start posts with strong headlines and a lead that hooks the reader from the start.

They’ll tell you to talk about the birth of a murderer, write posts asking people how they became who they are and or talk about coming Full Circle.

It makes sense to me. I understand why they push us to follow their advice.

Waves of content and communication are constantly slamming into us and that makes it harder to get people to click, read and comment.

But if you know me well, you know I tell you to do as I say and not as I do because I take the road less traveled.

I stopped asking why I have a knack for doing things the hard way or how if I pick a card I almost always find the Joker in the deck because the reasons don’t matter.

When you march to the beat of a different drummer who has no rhythm you learn to operate using a different skill set.

Steiner the minor asked me today if there is any way I could buy my parent’s house because he doesn’t want them to move and thinks the house should remain in the family.

I told him I understood his concern and we spoke a bit about the Echoes Of The People We Miss and then I reminded him that the reason ordinary things become extraordinary is because of the memories we attach to them.

My father overheard our conversation and spent a few minutes talking as a grandfather to his grandson and then he and I moved off into a corner and had a real talk. 

That’s not to say he was dishonest with his grandson because he wasn’t, but he is 15 and I am not.

Dad doesn’t sugar coat his thoughts or hide his feelings with me. I know exactly what he thinks and feels,

I don’t hold back with him either.

So we stood in the middle of the new home my mother and he are moving into and jumped right into it.

“What do you think of the new place?”

“I think it is great, but I don’t think you understand how many times you are going to walk up and down these stairs. Won’t hurt to get more exercise and if it doesn’t work, you can move again.”

“I don’t plan on moving again for another five or ten years. This probably won’t be the last place we live, but it will be fun. Mom & I have never lived in a place like this.”

“People plan and G-d laughs. I didn’t expect to lose my house, move to Texas or engage in any of the other shit of the last however long it’s been. That’s probably part of why I am so detached to so many things. I can walk away from almost all of it.”

“School doesn’t prepare you for life, it just helps you obtain some of the tools and skills you need to help you manage what comes along.”

I nodded at my father and smiled.

“Use it in good health Abba, I love the mountains and this area. You know I have thought about living out here many times.”

Questions With No Answers

Times like now make me miss my grandparents because I am curious to see if any of them relate to some of the things I am feeling now.

The place I am living in now isn’t home.

Doesn’t matter that I have been here for a couple of years now because I know this is a temporary rest stop, a place to hang my hat and get some occasional shut eye but nothing more than that.

My parents moved multiple times when they were kids which is why they worked hard to make sure that never happened to my sisters and I.

I hadn’t intended to provide anything different for my children than my experience, but you already know that doesn’t matter.

So in my state of perpetual transition I have managed to keep them feeling pretty grounded and am confident they are well adjusted.

But that doesn’t mean I am not interested in being able to say we have found a place where we’ll be for a long while, if not the long haul because I am.

I am pretty sure I know how my grandfathers would answer my questions. I know if I told them how having been burnt a few times has made me more guarded they would be concerned and maybe even disappointed.

But I’d remind them I am built for doing what needs to be done and for dancing in the fire.

I’d tell them I haven’t any doubt there will be a time when I am willing to be open in the manner they hope and that the right person will help with it.

And maybe I’d point them to some of the posts linked here and some others that I haven’t.

Not just to illustrate my point but because it fits with the lessons of our blog fathers.

Readers Discover & Writers Enlighten

I’d do these things because when readers discover they look for more to read and when writers enlighten readers tend to keep reading.

That is not just theory but proven fact.

I discovered it long before life stopped cooperating with blogging not to mention before I encountered The Dumbest Mother You Ever Met.

If all goes as the blog fathers say at least a few of you will click through to read some of those old posts and a few more will decide to leave a comment or two and or become regular readers here.

Remind me to tell you about how I found out an old high school friend lives in Texas and apparently was living not to far from me when I lived there.

And when you do I’ll ask you to share your thoughts about whether life is filled with coincidence or destiny.

Remind me and maybe I’ll tell you why I know there is something more than coincidence and about why you shouldn’t believe that either.

“If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
That you have but slumbered here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend:
If you pardon, we will mend:
And, as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearned luck
Now to ‘scape the serpent’s tongue,
We will make amends ere long;
Else the Puck a liar call;
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin shall restore amends.”
― William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night’s Dream