It has been a while since I last shared fan mail with my beloved 17 readers. And now I am pleased to present you with a fragment of one of the greatest testimonials that I have ever received.
Dear Jackass,
The reason that so many people hate the jblogosphere and the jibs is because of jerks like yourself. if you leaned how to be a mensch maybe your children wouldn’t be so bad and your wife would love you more. Why don’t you take Ezzie and go away…”
Hmm… I mulled over how to respond to this. I played around with printing the entire email, but it was missing something called grammar. That presented a problem because it was so poorly written that I didn’t think that people would be able to stomach it.
So while I sit here beaming with the pride I derived from your accolades let me share something with you. I am not sure that Serach would appreciate my taking Ezzie away. Not that it wouldn’t be good for him to be exposed to real sports teams. Ask Stacey about how much her life has improved since she left the burning river behind.
I wonder how many blogs there are in the Jblogosphere. I should Ask Shifra. I would guess that there are close to a thousand that are kind of involved in some capacity or another. But in terms of how many are actively updated I bet that the number would drop pretty dramatically.
I’d write more but I am late for a meeting of the Elders Of The Jblogosphere Meeting.
My favorite is the assumption that your children are “bad” and that you are experiencing a paucity of love from your wife.
Also, FYI, having been on the recieving end of some “jibs” on the jblogosphere, I have to say that you’ve been all that is kind. Some people are just asshats.
i thought I was the source of all tha tis unholy and impure in the Jewish Blogosphere.
Try again, tis I.
Chana,
Nope, I signed them for the Plains Dealer.
PT,
Could be.
Ezzie,
🙂
Depending on the day, she may appreciate it… 🙂
Stacey is on to something. Clearly whomever it is wants you to be with someone from Cleveland. Apparently, then Mashiach will come and Jews can live in peace.
who woulda thought?
Cleveland rocks!
Did you cancel this rat’s newspaper and magazine subscriptions? (since we control the media)
first of all, i thought I was the source of all tha tis unholy and impure in the Jewish Blogosphere.
second, why do they want you to take Ezzie? What about me? Why can’t I come, I could use a vacation from all my evilness. I need a break, it’s not easy being a horrible human being and the self destruction of the Jewish Blogosphere.
Just in case you dont get this comment on time. They moved the meetings, we killed all the puppies in the pound on Main street and have been meeting there now instead.
Ya. Thats how we roll. We hate puppies too.