Coming Soon: My Night With The Shmata Queen

Inquiring minds have been asking for more information about my night with The Shmata Queen. I could tell you about the ballroom dancing. Who knew that a tuxedo and long dress could do so much for people.

Or I could tell you about the Chicken Marengo she cooked and how it helped me get better acquainted with the bathroom. But something tells me that if I go into too much detail she’ll take that grandma sized black purse and hit me…again.

So I’ll have to stick to more mundane stories. And I promise not to say anything about the toilet paper that was stuck to her shoe. Ok, I said it, but I also proved that chivalry isn’t dead by removing it.

Oh so many stories to tell and so little time. What to do, what to do.