The JackB

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

Useful Information Used Usefully

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Sleeping

  1. Welcome To The Jungle– Guns N’ Roses
  2. Shoot To Thrill– AC/DC
  3. Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door– Bob Dylan
  4. Since I Have Been Loving You– Led Zeppelin
  5. With Or Without You– U2

Some things make me so angry I want to kick the dog and drown the cat. I want to drive down the sidewalk and run over all of the pedestrians and then for good measure do something far more heinous than all of those put together.

I would share that in more detail but the guys in legal are having a fit now and I am required to tell you that I don’t really want to do any of those things. I have taken literary license and created a fake facade that is designed for the sole purpose of capturing the attention of my readers.

Hmm…I wonder if the guys in legal have a problem with me saying I want to give them all a colonoscopy without the benefit of anesthesia. Of course the guys in legal aren’t all male and at least two of the women gave birth naturally so they aren’t afraid of the aforementioned colonoscopy. Well,  I am not impressed by them because everyone knows that our great grandmothers would give birth and then be back in the fields an hour later.

They make those women in legal look so damn lazy.

Useful Information Used Usefully

Today I was overwhelmed by the noise in the blogosphere. I must have read 2,983,839 posts about the same  topics:

  • How to blog
  • Why To blog
  • How To Deal With Writer’s Block
  • How to make every post useful
  • 872 Things You Must Need To Know

Dammit, none of them were smart enough to use a headline like How To Have Better Sex Through Blogging. It is not all that hard to write, hell let’s give it a quick try.

Blogging is a fantastic way to help you and your partner supercharge your sex life. The best and most obvious way is to use your blog as a tool to improve communication between you and your husband/wife/partner/lover.

Better communication leads to increased feelings of comfort and a deeper sense of love and affection. Not to mention it is sometimes easier to tell your honey that they aren’t quite hitting the spot during daylight hours as opposed to during intimacy.

Two minutes is all it took me to write that. I wouldn’t call it stellar but it is better than many. Of course I once wrote a post called The Secret To Better Sex. It was quite successful.

It didn’t generate oodles of comments but it receives regular traffic and the readers tend to click through the links there, none of which deal with tips about how to have sex. There are links to posts about writing and posts about relationships, but nothing that tells you how to touch…

That post also has links to two other posts that are important and useful. One is a post that contains a list of vocabulary words. I love that one because I love words. Here is a short selection:

  • Raconteur-One who tells stories and anecdotes with skill and wit.
  • Callipygian–adj.Having beautifully proportioned buttocks.
  • Lachrymose–adj.Weeping or inclined to weep; tearful. Causing or tending to cause tears.
  • Perspicacious–adj. Having or showing penetrating mental discernment; clear-sighted.
  • Flibbertigibbet–n. A silly, scatterbrained, or garrulous person.

The second one talks about the death of my grandfather last year and contains stories about my grandparents in general. Been thinking about them quite a bit lately and wondering what they might say about some of the things that are going on.

One day I hope to build the sort of relationship with my grandchildren that I had with my grandparents. When I think about the things I am doing now and the plans I am making I see their fingerprints and feel their presence.

These plans are mine and none of them could have predicted any of this but that is ok. Where I see the connections are the work I am doing to take care of my family. They would understand and appreciate it.

Still it would have been fun to watch their faces while I tried to explain whether there is a difference between a dad blogger and a regular blogger.

Ask For What You Want & What You Need

Sometimes life provides you with the opportunity to get more than what you need and you can ask for what you want. If you want to be happy you need to figure out what you need. When you understand this and have identified what brings you joy you can develop a plan to obtain these things.

One of the useful pieces of information that blogging provided for me were the answers to many of these questions.

This is part of Just Write #40.

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Comments

  1. rdopping

    I’ve been workin’ from 7 to 11 every night and it makes life of a drag but since I’ve been lovin’ you I am about to lose my worried mind……. @TheJackB I do love your style my man. What’s really great is I can’t put my finger on it (not that I would want to). It’s always a crap shoot. You never know what you’re going to get.
     
    I have to say that I haven’t listened to that Zeppelin song in a while and I am LOVING IT all over again. For that, I thank you.

    Reply

    • TheJackB

       @rdopping 
       
      Hi Ralph,
       
      Zeppelin never gets old They have such a large catalog I can always find plenty to listen to, as well as my old favorites.
       
      Confession: Half the time I don’t know what you are going to get either.

      Reply

  2. BruceSallan

    Do you know, JB, without looking where “Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door” came from or was written for, to be more specifically? It is maybe my favorite Dylan song, though I probably like Guns ‘N’ Roses version the best. 

    Reply

  3. Late_Bloomers

    Hi Jack, 
     
    I come here for the music. No, this is not true, this is a perk (where is Bill Dorman ?) as well as your vocabulary list, nobody has yet referred to some of my body parts as being “callipygian”, do I only know boors?
     
    Like @CrossBetsy  said there is a high entertainment factor to your blog and always something to be learnt,  I am completely thrown by your “How to Have Better Sex Through Blogging” (and your speed writing).
     
    Happiness is getting up in the morning, greet the new day with a cup of coffee and enjoy the first sun rays. Today it is raining.

    Reply

    • TheJackB

       @Late_Bloomers  Bill Dorman  @CrossBetsy 
       
      Hi Barbara,
       
      My apologies, I could have sworn that I had responded to your comment. I am so glad that you come by to visit and that you enjoy this joint.
       
      It is easy for me to write, English is my first language. I am always impressed by people like yourself who can also do it so well.

      Reply

  4. AdrienneSmith

    You are hilarious Jack.  
     
    Now you know why you can’t pull anything over on some women.  They’ve been through it all and back so many times and are a lot tougher then people give them credit for.  Okay, I’m talking about the pain thing here ya know!  lol..
     
    Many times I’ve thought about throwing some really revealing headline out there that would grab people’s attention but I don’t want to be another one of “those” who are just doing it to get people to my post.  They would be sorely disappointed to find that I only enticed them through the headline and the rest isn’t quite cutting it.  Okay, just not delivering on what was promised.  Nope, not doing that.  But the words sexy and blogging, that would definitely do it.
     
    As far as being happy!  Heck, I’m just thankful I’m alive, I have a roof over my head, food on my table and people who love me. If that doesn’t make you happy I sure don’t know what will.

    Reply

    • TheJackB

       @AdrienneSmith Hi Adrienne,
       
      I would never try and pull anything over on anyone because I will only get into trouble…again. 😉
       
      Some of those headlines are fun to write because they are so ridiculous. I can’t help myself, sometimes I have to come up with something really goofy just to see what happens.
       
      The peace of mind that comes with happiness is invaluable. If you could bottle that you would be rich beyond your wildest dreams.

      Reply

  5. CrossBetsy

    I regularly ask myself why I keep coming back (here, there, and a lot of other blogs) when we aren’t really moving anything forward. And it’s in that question that I find out why…I’m entertained. That’s it! 
    I learn things…or am reminded…
    “If you want to be happy you need to figure out what you need. When you understand this and have identified what brings you joy you can develop a plan to obtain these things.”
    <Liker you said, except I’d replace “If you want to be happy you need to figure out what you need” with, if you know what you want and need….’cause I’m already happy! 🙂

    Reply

    • TheJackB

       @CrossBetsy 
       
      Hi Betsy,
       
      I love your last line. I run into so many people who aren’t happy it is a pleasure to be around someone who is. 
       
      Unhappiness is something that I have a hard time understanding, or maybe a better way of expressing it is to say that I don’t understand why people don’t try to change their situation.
       
      if life hurts it is important to take a moment to try to find a different way. Better to try and fail than not at all. At least that is how I see it. Hope you continue to be entertained and that you find a million reasons to continue to be happy.

      Reply

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