Ma & Pa Steiner taught me long ago that life isn’t fair and not to take “what goes around, comes around” as being the literal truth.
Experience taught me there are grains of truth in that particular field so I passed it along to my children.
“Some people will lie, cheat and steal their way into destiny, but they have to live with themselves, you don’t.”
The kids asked me what that meant and I said some people don’t have a conscience.
When they grew older and became capable of more sophisticated conversation we pulled it apart and talked about how our understanding and interpretation of that inner voice impacts our behavior.
“Dad, have you done things that you don’t feel good about?”
I nodded my head and said that everyone does but we didn’t get into specific details or how we sometimes find ourselves in situations we never expected to be in.
When you have lived a life and I have lived, you find yourself in those peculiar places that make you understand you must make a choice.
A choice to view the world as a series of black lines that cannot ever be crossed or even stepped upon or an understanding sometimes you’ll have to be like Max and go where the wild things are.
If you are like me, well you’ll throw your head back and roar, you’ll join the wild rumpus and do your best to live hard.
And then at some point you’ll climb a tree or find some quiet place to look around and think about all you have seen and done.
Because you’ll look at the tightrope you were just walking upon and wonder how it was you didn’t fall only to discover you’re standing on a different one.
Maybe you’ll throw your head back and catch raindrops on your tongue, dance in the storm and take joy in the moment.
Or maybe you’ll scream with rage at the sky, dare the lightning to strike you and pretend that stomping your feet brings down the thunder.
Do People Really Get What They Deserve?
I grew up in what people would describe as an upper-middle-class home but surrounded by money.
I knew from a very young age that we didn’t have as much as others who had bigger houses and more toys.
I knew I was lucky to have as much as we did and that my parents always made sure we went on a family trip each summer.
But I also remember when we didn’t have any furniture in our living room and that while my schoolmates were boarding planes to Hawaii, Europe, Israel or wherever my vacation meant being jammed in the station wagon with my sisters.
Some of those kids were what is the term, oh yeah, entitled assholes, but not all.
Won’t say, can’t say that I wasn’t ever jealous or that I didn’t compare my life to the other kids but I can say that whatever my parents said about not comparing my life to others worked.
Can’t say what words they used, I just realized I’d never be happy if I compared myself to others and I have done my best to pass that along to my own children.
Some people have nothing and are always happy and some have everything and are never happy.
But none of that really touches upon whether people get what they deserve.
*****
Most days I try not to spend much time hoping or wondering whether Karma will kick the ass of those who need its special ass kicking services.
It is too easy to ask why some really bad people have done so well for themselves and why some really good have done so poorly.
Too easy to look at my life and say WTF to the sky because though I have done my tap dance on, over and around those lines I am a decent guy.
Too easy to look at my kids and then back to the sky and ask why they didn’t get better because they are just kids and their slates are cleaner than my own.
So I focus on what I can control and teach them to do the same, work hard and do your best to live in a way that lets you sleep well at night.
More Flotsam & Jetsam
Got The Association singing Never My Love in my ears and a series of thoughts and ideas surrounding You Should Slap The Devil & Sleep With His Wife.
Not sure how many people did more than click on the link before moving on to the next bright and shiny object.
Heard from some people who said I make their head hurt because these posts are chock full of layers and layers of…stuff.
Told them no one forces anyone to read anything here and then laughed because it made me think of my audio post about blog cancellation fees.
Heard from another guy who said that I am not really a dad blogger anymore because I don’t write like a dad blogger.
Told him that since he got a vasectomy he is not a real man and he said that I misunderstand what happens during a vasectomy because his balls weren’t cut off.
Responded by telling him that having a set isn’t a requirement for being a man and then because I am filled with enough testosterone for 98 men I said if we got in a fight I would slap him because he didn’t deserve my knuckles.
Ok, I didn’t say to this particular guy, but I have told men that before.
Why?
Because when you slap the devil and sleep with his wife you don’t settle for a simple “fuck you” or “fuck off.”
No, you want to make them think about what you said.
Sometimes it is worth reminding ourselves not to take life too seriously, the whole damn thing is fucking absurd.
Our understanding of time is rough our perception of a moment is flawed.
So instead of trying to control other people and all that happens around me I focus on doing my best to be the conductor of my life and to not fear taking risks.
Life isn’t fair, but if you’re willing to live it can be a hell of a lot of fun.
Renee McKinley says
Headache?
I read exactly two blogs regularly. Yours and one other. I may not always comment. But I leave the space with a head full of thoughts and quite often a smile.
And your play lists appeal to me as well.
Keep writing Jack.
Jack Steiner says
Hi Renee,
You have been around a long time already and I appreciate your kind words and support. It doesn’t go unnoticed.
Larry says
This line is so true. It’s all about perspective. We have to remember what actually is important.
Some people have nothing and are always happy and some have everything and are never happy.
Jack Steiner says
It is easy to forget, but important to remember.