Your Parent Blog Is My Cure For Insomnia

Morning has broken and I am exhausted.

That is because I just fought off the Canadian 993rd Polar Bear Army and the seven Englishmen who were offended because I disagreed with their opinions.

Told the Angry Canucks that I love our little brother to the North and think the Monopoly money they call currency is cute.

Most of them were too polite to say I offended them but that didn’t stop an angry Habs fan from throwing a handful of Looneys and Tooneys at me for saying PK is overrated.

Last but not least let’s not forget the Man U fan who didn’t think it was funny when I asked him to speak American.

He ranted for a moment damn near lost it when I told him William Wallis should have won the war and burned the nation to the ground.

Guy tried to accuse me of promoting genocide but I eviscerated his remarks with a few comments ab0ut the empire and then for good measure made fun of his football team.

In theory that elevated my troll rating to somewhere above hated but below despised.

I’ll let you decide whether a man who shares the story about a thief who breaks into a home and cooks a pork roast in a Kosher kitchen should be taken seriously.

Or maybe I should say I’ll let you decide how seriously he should be taken because someone who speaks in third person and uses the ‘Royal’ We to describe parent blogs as a cure for insomnia might have some issues.

Then again maybe issues isn’t the right word, maybe problem is a better descriptor.

Because my problem is that I find a ton of your blogs to be devoid of humor, emotion and substance.

Maybe it is because some of you are so desperately trying to be noticed by brands and other blogs you tear the soul out of your writing and publish sterile nonsense that won’t hurt or offend.

You publish posts about the great product you got for free and limit or avoid real criticism.

Not every product is amazing or great.

Some of them suck or have things that suck.

I don’t care if you write sponsored posts provided you are authentic in your writing.

If it is great there is nothing wrong with saying that but then again there is nothing wrong with saying that it needs some work.

Constructive criticism is a good thing. If I read your review I want to know what you think and not feel like you were nice because you hope to get more crap.

Tell me you love the life size teddy bear costume but that because of how it is made you crapped down the side of it in the outhouse at the fair.

Show me the raw and authentic side of your life and I’ll nod my head and cheer you on. I’ll tell you that being the father of teens and preteens is really freaking hard.

I’ll say The End Of Goodnight Kisses was hard and that I wasn’t completely ready for it.

I’ll tell you that the kids have figured out that I don’t have all the answers and come up with really good questions.

Heck, there is a lot I’d like to say and share assuming that people are listening and or reading.

Thing is I am not sure how much of that is really happening any more.

Engagement & Noise

I won’t bore you with a long rant about engagement levels have changed since I began this gig.

Won’t spend a lot of time talking about what was and or offering hypotheses about content shock and or whether people are just tired in general.

I’ll just say that my traffic numbers are down a bit but not so much that I expect engagement to have plummeted the way it has.

And I’ll say the first thing I do is ask myself if my content is simply boring the readers.

Some of that is to be expected but I also know from conversations with others that similar things are going on across the blogosphere.

And I know that as I mentioned I simply stopped showing up at some blogs because the real and authentic content I like is non existent.

You don’t have to write for me, especially when I say that I write first for me and then for you.

But I would be remiss if I didn’t mention why some places see me less and less.

It is just not that interesting anymore so I am looking for new places and spaces.

I figure people do the same with their evaluation of this joint.

Don’t mistake this for my desire to go back in time because I am not trying to turn back the clock, but it would be nice to see a new beginning where the content and conversation were more interesting.

I don’t know, maybe it is just me.

Got to run now, the Polar Bear army is back at the base of my castle.