Blog

Does your blog need a logo is the sort of question that usually sends me off on a five minute rant about stupid headlines. That is because lately I have become even more enamored with describing myself as your favorite dad blogger turned curmudgeon.

Granted I am the writer whose disdain for these things has been well documented. If you haven’t had the pleasure of reading those posts I’ll do you a favor and share a bunch with you. Go. Read. Now.

Go, I said. We’ll wait for you.

1. Great Headlines Are Overrated
2. Great Headlines Don’t Drive Traffic
3. More Proof That Great Headlines Don’t Matter
4. How To Write Powerful Headlines
5. Cheaper Than A $5 Whore With Less Risk of Infection

I left out a bunch of others like the one about the talking penis or the other in which I said that I should have slept with her again. And yes dear Jayme, I understand that some of these are going to attract a different sort of element than I want, but I know how to deal with them.

You see I am at my best when I am unfettered and feeling feisty. Take off the gloves, remove the chains and watch out because when the words are flowing and fingers are flying I take great joy in pounding the hell out of a…keyboard.

Answer The Damn Question

The answer to the question is yes, your blog needs a logo. It needs some kind of image that helps distinguish it from the others. There is an awful lot of noise out there and if you want to memorable and recognized a logo can go a long way to making that happen.

But bear in mind that it doesn’t replace the need for good content. Anyone who says otherwise is a damn fool and in need of my size 12 boot in their ass. How is that for a friendly sort of hello.

Ok, it is not very friendly and not particularly endearing unless of course you like grumpy forty something year-old men who blog about anything and everything. Did you know that the social media experts tell you that it is a mistake to do that.

Those exceptionally intelligent men and women think that readers are too stupid to read more than 120 words and that you have the attention span of gnats.

I’ll make like the Redhead and say that they need to be slapped, beaten and told to fuck off. But the thing is that I am not her and I don’t want to be her. I like being a man. Maybe it is because it is all I have ever known or maybe it is because I like being equipped to put out camp fires without fear of torching my butt.

Why Are You Blogging and What Do You Hope To Accomplish?

If you are blogging for business and can’t answer that question we should probably sit down so that I can knock some sense into you. Why would you spend time doing something for work without knowing what it is you are doing and what you hope to accomplish.

That is just a waste and you should treat yourself better than to throw away your time like that.  This is important so I will type slowly for those who have trouble keeping up.

You need to know why you are blogging and what your objectives are because that is the only way you can determine whether your effort is successful. It is the only way that you can establish metrics that are usable, measurable and valuable.

I am not a social media expert. I am not the world’s greatest businessman. There are people who are smarter, richer, happier and a host of other ‘ers as well.

But I do know a couple of things about all this and that is why Jack, the grumpy old dad blogger who hates posts that are stuffed with keywords and looks at headlines with disdain is sharing this with you.

1. Determine why are you are blogging and what you hope to accomplish.
2. Figure out what metrics you need to determine whether your effort is successful.
3. Get a cool logo. Yes, I know that I need one. I haven’t done it yet but I might try someone on Fiverr.
4. Have Fun.

My apologies. I planned on writing more but I have go make dinner. Some of the social media experts will tell you that it is a mistake for me to stop in the middle this way. I will tell them to go play in the street and remind you that there is no one way to do this.

Social media is about people. Some of you will love me. Some of you will hate me. Some of you will be ambivalent. But if I show up on a regular basis and engage in normal conversation with you good things will come from that. And if I do that for an extended period of time more good things will come from that.

Remember the pyramids weren’t built in a day but many were built by my people which reminds me that I am going to submit an invoice to Egypt. Those hieroglyphic painting, slave owning, pyramid building yahoos owe me a chunk of change plus interest.

Wonder if they’ll give me ownership of the Sphinx. Ok, off to dinner now.

Try not to take life so seriously, I don’t.

I never realized that rebuilding a car would provide valuable lessons in how to build and design a blog.

My first car was a 1969 Dodge Dart Swinger. It was a hunk of metal placed around a simple Slant 6 engine. I bought it in the Fall of 1986 for $300.00 and then spent hours fixing it up. More than a few moments of my time was spent cruising through old junk yards looking for things like transmissions, deck lid, headlights and other parts that I couldn’t afford to purchase new.

Those hours in the yard and in the garage helped me build a skill set that I applied to the building and redesign of this blog. That was when I learned about the value in creating a list of things to be done and the need to create a sketch of what I wanted the final product to look like.

It is also where I learned that sometimes you could blow off steam by using a hammer or crow bar to beat the hell out of some junker that was already semi destroyed. Unfortunately you can’t do that in blogging. It is considered juvenile, unprofessional and foolish to use a hammer on your laptop. Nor are you allowed to defenestrate it.

Ok, let me take a step back and share some reality with you. I really did all those things I mentioned above but I didn’t do them with the redesign of this blog. That was a mistake.

What I Should Have Done

What I should have done is taken few minutes to write down a paragraph or two about what I wanted the new blog to look like and the kind of functions I wanted to have. What I should have done is drawn a simple sketch or created some sort of mockup of what I wanted it to look like.

Then I could have conducted a simple search to see if there are any blogs out there that had design elements I wanted to replicate or modify. After that it would have been a simple process to find out what sort of work was necessary to make those things happen.

But I didn’t do those things.

What I Did

What I did is wing it. What I did was build and design by Braille. I purchased a new theme and blew everything up here. Then I took the fragments and slowly pieced them together to see what sort of creation I could build. Never did get my Doc. Frankenstein moment of shouting “IT IS ALIVE” but I did use some other colorful words.

The end product and I use that term loosely is better than what I had when I started. There are still changes to be made and some adjustments here and there but overall I am pleased with what I see.

So now I can return to making content the primary focus and design will move back to the number two position.

If you have any comments, criticism or thoughts in general please feel free to leave them in the comments.

The original headline of this post was supposed to be 18 Reasons To Read This Blog- Part 2.  Correction the original title was “The Post That Bill Dorman Almost Wrote But Didn’t.”

Since Bill used to be the invisible blogger I like sending traffic his way. The likelihood of his being invisible is about the same as The Bloggess highlighting the next 50 posts I write. Those of you who know me in real life know that crazy stuff happens to me all the time so I wouldn’t be surprised if she sent me an email to let me know that she had decided that it was important for all of her readers to learn more about me.

Really, one day Marcus is going to include me in his list of bloggers to read. One day soon you’ll Danny Brown and Margie Clayman link up with me too. Take a moment to go wish Danny a happy third blogiversary and to read Margie’s post about installing Livefyre on her blog. Go on, we’ll wait for you.

C’mon Jayme.  We’re waiting for you and Ken to finish. Someone tell Brian to let Henry Wood go for a moment.

What Is The Point Of The Headline?

The point is that for the past four hours every time I tried to take a moment to write something came up and prevented me from doing so. It was uncanny the way life and responsibilities got in the way of the blog. There were telephone calls about sick relatives, work issues, bills, homework and a boatload of other things that made me feel like I was running in mud.

And I being the most patient father in the world walked out of my office, stepped outside and screamed at the Universe to “Back Off!” Ok, I didn’t scream because I didn’t want to freak out the neighbors but I didn’t have to. Really, my magic powers and exceptionally intense personality sent the message out into the world. And then for good measure I smiled broadly and asked for the universe to send me $10k. I figured it never hurts to ask and then while lost in contemplation I upped the number substantially.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained

So in an effort to practice what I preach I took a deep breath and reminded myself to go along and get along. This is how I reached the 18 Reasons To Read This Blog- Part 2 idea. It is a quick sequel to this post in which I provided a list of some of the most popular posts to appear here.

Every now and then it is good to share that information. It never hurts to showcase some of your most popular stuff to those who might not have seen it. And when you are jammed for time it is quick. But the universe in its infinite wisdom didn’t let me fire that off and in fact has continued to interrupt me while I am writing this one.

Bad move universe. I am a Taurus and you don’t to aggravate the bull or you’ll get the horns. You must be one of those people who thinks that the SEC plays real football or that the celtics play real basketball. So here I am determined to finish this damn post.

Here are a bunch of posts that my stats say are quite popular. Some of them may be repeats from the old list but some could be new. Read and enjoy and I promise to share a new post with real writing later this evening.

1. Some Things I’ll Teach My Children (Updated)
2. A Father Describes Parenting
3. Teach Your Children To Be Responsible With Money
4. An Open Letter To Triberr Members
5. Your Blog Bores Me
6. My Children Confront Death Again
7. A Whiter Shade Of Pale
8. The Best Cover Letter….Ever
9. Would You Read This Story Part 3
10. Mean Girls Come From Mean Moms
11. One Slightly Used Pump For Sale
12. When Mean Girls Grow Up
13. More Proof That Great Headlines Don’t Matter
14. Facebooking Proves That Time Doesn’t Heal All Wounds
15. The GermoPhobe
16. It is Called Life
17. Life Lessons Learned on the Soccer Field 
18. Know Your Own Worth

It is just after midnight and I am making my rounds of the blogosphere. Been by Griddy’s blog to leave more comments and battle for top commenter supremacy. Hit John’s interview with his brother and Jayme’s place as well. I am wide awake and working on developing a rhythm for my words.

Headphones on my ears my head bobs back and forth to the sweet sounds of the Doobie Brothers singing Nobody. I feel the music and search for a way to transfer that energy onto the page. My fingers dance across the keyboard and a broad smile works its way across my face.

It is part of my quest to find the perfect post. A noble journey that every blogger pure of heart and purpose takes part in. What I want is simple- a post that makes every reader respond the way that an audience responds to Bruce. I can’t say that the Boss is my favorite artist, but he is right up there. He is up there because every time I watch him perform I see him put his heart into it. That passion and single-minded purpose resonates with me. It lights a fire.

That is my goal…to light a fire inside you that makes you do more than nod your head in agreement. I want you to feel what I feel. I want you to see what I see. I am not lying when I say that I write first for me and then for you. I am not contradicting myself when I talk about the passion and purpose I attack the keyboard with. If I write with purpose and power you get caught up in the world that the words create and you add the color to it.

I want that perfect post to have so much power in it that people remember it, if not the whole thing than just one line that sticks with them forever. So every time I take my turn at bat I swing for the fences and hope that practice really does make perfect.

Why do you write?