Things About Jack

In a different time and place a boy named Jack planned on becoming a professional baseball player. He was a fine athlete and for a brief time he was among the best of the 12 year old baseball players in the Little League.

Jack led the league in homeruns, although truth be known he actually was tied with two other boys, but this is his story so we’ll leave those guys out. Jack usually played in left or center field.

He was fast enough to run down fly balls and had a great arm for a kid his age. It made Jack very happy to see that his father’s promise that extra practice would pay off was accurate. And so it seemed to him that there was no reason why he couldn’t one day grace Dodger Stadium.

But people plan and G-d laughs and life took Jack in a different direction. And so it came to pass that by the time he hit high school he didn’t even try out for the team, instead he played other sports. He was good at most of them and perhaps he could have been great, but we’ll never know for certain.

When high school ended Jack intended to spend his freshman year of college in Israel. It was a dream that he had been desiring to fulfill for years. He found and applied to a program and was accepted into it people plan and G-d laughs. Things happened and at the last minute he was forced to withdraw. And so it came to pass that another dream crumbled into dust.

A few years later Jack made plans to go to Israel for his junior year abroad. He was very excited about the prospect and spent much time thinking about what it would be like. He worked diligently to try and make it happen but people plan and G-d laughs.

Jack fell in love with a girl and decided that he didn’t want to give up the opportunity to see where romance would lead him and opted not to go to Israel. And in doing so he made a big mistake that he swore he would learn from.

Instead of having an incredible experience ten thousand miles from home he was introduced to the pain of a broken heart. The relationship ended and he spent a lot of time trying to figure out how it was that people could be so happy when he felt so miserable.

The now 20 year old Jack had a baby blue Camaro that he loved. It was his chariot and his sanctuary. In it he forgot about the things that troubled him and he spent many happy hours driving around the state in it.

Unfortunately others decided that they wanted to possess his Camaro and so they did their best to try and “obtain” it for themselves. They never did manage to take the car but they did run off with two car stereos. And so it came to pass that Jack tried to foil their plans by purchasing a
Pull Out Car Stereo.

Some of you may remember those days. It was a time when you literally pulled car stereo out and carried it with you. And so it came to pass that one day someone decided that they wanted to take Jack’s pull out car stereo. It is certain that they were convinced that they would be able to wrest it from his grasp, but people plan and G-d laughs.

Just when they thought that they would be able to secure it for themselves Jack introduced it to the side of their head and so it came to pass that they decided that their interaction with Jack was complete and they made a point to leave.

Many other stories could be told along these lines. You could read about Jack’s intent to become an attorney, his plan to move to Israel at 24 and a dozen other things that Jack planned on doing but didn’t.

Jack learned that there was a lot of truth to saying people plan and G-d laughs. That is not to say that all of his plans were foiled. Many were not. Jack has a big checklist of things that went his way, but there were moments when he found himself looking skyward and asking why.

And so it has come to past that Jack tries to remind himself that part of the joy of living is the journey. But he also wonders if it would be so hard to occasionally grant him some of the things that he asks for. Would there really be that much harm.

Stay tuned and perhaps you’ll find out.

Tales of Brave Ulysses– Cream

Have you ever read the Odyssey? As a kid it was one of my favorite stories. I loved mythology and reading about Odysseus just fascinated me. A general who was one of those who went to war because of Helen of Troy. A hero who fought for ten years to find his way home and then when he got there still had to undergo more challenges before he could regain his kingdom.

When I find myself feeling overwhelmed with the challenges presented by life I sometimes think about these kinds of stories. I look at the challenges faced by Hercules and the little boy that still lives within imagines what it would be like to be that guy.

Part of what I have always enjoyed about these stories is that the heroes have a tragic flaw. They may be capable of incredible feats, but they are also subject to doing incredibly stupid things. It makes them far more human.

I suppose that is part of why I appreciate Harry Potter or The Lord of The Rings stories. The hero is an ordinary person placed in extraordinary circumstances. To be clear I appreciate that though they may win in the end, they do not avoid tragedy. It is far more real.

Lately I find myself engaged in trying times. It is not all that different from many others. The challenges that I face aren’t unique. Many people face them, but the difference is that they are mine. I am the one that is forced to make the decisions about what sort of action to take or not to take. I am the person who gets to make the hard call about whether to answer the bell with a flurry of kicks and punches or to spend a round getting punched in the mouth.

In the quiet moment of the evening I write down these words and wonder whether the house of cards I live in will sway with the wind or collapse. Intellectually I haven’t any doubt that one day I will look back upon this time as just a memory. It will be like every other experience in my life. Some of it will make me smile and some of it will make me sad.

Emotionally it is challenging. Because the decisions I make will affect all of my family, but as to what the final effect of these decisions will be it is unclear. It is moments like this that I look at my parents and gain a far greater appreciation for what they did.

It reminds me of conversations I used to have with my grandfather. It has been 2.5 years since he died and not a day goes by that I don’t think about him. For that matter it has been a little more than ten since we lost “D.” I think of him often too.

I go back and forth about what my belief about olam habah is or is not. I go back and forth about whether I believe in a heaven. Most of the time I think that there is. But I live my life in the present. I try to do good things now because I think that it is the right thing to do, not because I want some heavenly reward.

Sometimes I think of my grandfather and “D” as being part of the vanguard that gets to check out wherever we go after we die.

Going back to my grandfather I can remember him advising me about life. He’d tell me that all we can do is the best that we can do, advice echoed by my father. Not surprising considering they were father and son.

There were moments that I found it to be infuriating because sometimes I felt that my best wasn’t good enough. But as time has gone by I have found it easier to accept. I may start a new post that covers this.